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How to Ask Your Partner Better Questions

Our last blog tackled how to ask better questions of your coworkers and friends. This week, we want to talk about asking better questions of your partner. It’s Valentine’s Day (let’s be honest, it stretches out all weekend), so what better time to rethink how we connect with the significant others in our lives?

This is part of our February series, as we focus on how you can ask better questions. From tips on brainstorming good questions to smart resources and a whole lot more, we will compile relevant articles, blogs, and videos to help you challenge how you ask questions.

Questions are the way we connect with others and learn more about them. And they are an essential part of building a solid relationship, too. Asking questions in a kind, respectful, and open way can increase the connection you share with your significant other. And maybe even reveal something new about them.

Connecting on a Deeper Level through Questions

a man and a women conversing over coffee

Asking thoughtful questions of your partner or significant other is about getting to a deeper level. You don’t want to just know how they are, you want to know who they are. And that’s the big difference to focus on when thinking about questions to ask someone to really gain a deeper understanding of what drives them and their personal narrative.

Similar to questions in How Do You See the World, this list of 36 Deep Questions poses questions you might not normally think of to ask someone such as: What is your most treasured memory? And What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

Or maybe you’ve already been with your partner for some time and date night has become the usual chit chat of work, family concerns, and not much else. You can shake things up a bit by pulling a few questions from this list that will help liven the conversation and maybe even let you learn something new about your long-term partner.

Getting to Know Someone

two women sitting on bench getting to know each other better

Asking thoughtful questions is also a great way to get to know a new romantic person in your life. And you can learn a lot about what kind of questions to ask by listening to people who have had successful long-term relationships. The Today Show featured this spot, which asks the advice of a couple who have been together for 18 years. And there are some great questions to consider!

And Bustle also tackles the getting-to-know-you aspect of new relationships, with this great list of questions suitable for couples who want to make sure they are on the same page.

Whatever stage of a relationship you’re in, asking better questions is a great way to get to know your partner better and, in the process, get to know yourself a little bit better, too.

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